Episode 511: Paul Simon

Paul inspires Gonzo to be a songwriter. Unfortunately, Gonzo writes songs like "For You": "For youuu... I'd wash my hair with stinky glue, I'd fry my legs and eat them too, I'd put a spider in my shoe -- for yoouuuu!" Paul is stunned. Later, Gonzo's chickens run off with Paul, so Gonzo develops a new obsession -- asparagus.

Songs/Sketches

 * Paul sings "Scarborough Fair" in a Renaissance-flavored number, complete with maypole dancing and lute players.
 * Floyd and Janice sing "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover".
 * Guest Star's Dressing Room: Pops asks Paul to sing "Long Long Day".
 * UK Spot: Veterinarian's Hospital: Gonzo / Muppet News Flash: Overdue Library Books
 * Guest Star's Dressing Room: Gonzo sings his latest song, "For You", for Paul.
 * Gonzo and the chickens sing "El Condor Pasa". Paul interrupts the number.
 * Bobby Benson and his Baby Band sing "Baby Driver".
 * Paul sings "Loves Me Like a Rock", backed by Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem and The Female Singers.

Quotes

 * Kermit: "Gonzo, you're not going to sing, are you? Why don't you do that act you rehearsed?"
 * Gonzo: "What? Perform an underwater heart transplant operation on myself?"
 * Kermit: "Sure, why not?"
 * Gonzo: "I don't know. Last time I did it, I died."

Cast
Muppets:
 * Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, The Great Gonzo, Rowlf the Dog, Statler, Waldorf, Link Hogthrob, Floyd Pepper, Janice, Animal, Pops, The Newsman, Bobby Benson, Baby Band, Lew Zealand, Beauregard, Baby Asparagus, Chickens, Pig, Goat, Whatnots

Background Muppets:
 * Scooter, Rizzo the Rat, Zoot, Dr. Teeth, Ronald Duck, Sheep

Performers

 * Jim Henson as Kermit the Frog, Waldorf, Rowlf, Link Hogthrob, and the Newsman
 * Frank Oz as Fozzie Bear, Miss Piggy, and Animal
 * Dave Goelz as Gonzo and Beauregard
 * Jerry Nelson as Pops, Floyd Pepper, Camilla, and the Announcer
 * Richard Hunt as Janice, Bobby Benson, and Statler
 * Steve Whitmire as Rizzo the Rat and Female Singer
 * Kathy Mullen as Baby and Female Singer
 * Louise Gold as Baby Asparagus and Female Singer

Video releases

 * The Best of the Muppet Show

Edits

 * Nickelodeon: "Vet's Hospital" was cut, as was Muppet News and the second backstage sequence.
 * CTS: U.K. Spot versions of "Vet's Hospital" and Muppet News were cut.