Episode 313: Helen Reddy/transcript

1 00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:09,534 [knocking]

2 00:00:09,599 --> 00:00:12,536 Helen Reddy? 30 seconds to curtain, Miss Reddy.

3 00:00:12,599 --> 00:00:14,935 OK, Scooter. l'll be there.

4 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,102 Ready or not.

5 00:00:17,166 --> 00:00:20,536 Yeah... did you mean to make that ioke?

6 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:24,337 Well, l meant to make that joke before someone else did.

7 00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:26,535 You think we'd stoop that low?

8 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,802 Hey, three to get ready!

9 00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:31,401 Lower.

10 00:00:32,399 --> 00:00:33,801 [drum roll]

11 00:00:33,866 --> 00:00:36,802 It's The Muppet Show with our vey special guest star,

12 00:00:36,866 --> 00:00:40,035 Miss Helen Reddy. Yay!

13 00:00:40,100 --> 00:00:42,735 [applause and whistles]

14 00:00:53,433 --> 00:00:57,270 It's time to light the light
 * 1) It's time to play the music

15 00:00:57,333 --> 00:01:01,370 on The Muppet Show tonight
 * 1) It's time to meet the Muppets

16 00:01:01,433 --> 00:01:05,637 It's time to dress up right
 * 1) It's time to put on makeup

17 00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:07,535
 * 1) It's time to get things started

18 00:01:07,599 --> 00:01:09,702
 * 1) Why don't you get things started?

19 00:01:10,433 --> 00:01:14,003 Hey! There's chickens in our seat! Shoo!

20 00:01:14,066 --> 00:01:15,767
 * 1) It's time to get things started

21 00:01:15,833 --> 00:01:18,235
 * 1) On the most sensational, inspirational

22 00:01:18,299 --> 00:01:20,435
 * 1) Celebrational, Muppetational

23 00:01:20,500 --> 00:01:26,305 The Muppet Show! #
 * 1) This is what we call

24 00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:30,602 Itinkling notes]

25 00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,968 - [applause] - Thank you, thank you.

26 00:01:36,033 --> 00:01:38,201 And welcome again to rhe Muppet Show.

27 00:01:38,266 --> 00:01:40,201 Hey, we've got a terrific show tonight.

28 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:44,269 Our special guest is one of the world's greatest singing talents, Helen Reddy.

29 00:01:44,333 --> 00:01:48,070 But right now, we whisk you back through time and space

30 00:01:48,133 --> 00:01:49,834 to the Palace of Versailles,

31 00:01:49,900 --> 00:01:52,669 where Marie Antoinette bears a striking resemblance

32 00:01:52,733 --> 00:01:55,135 to our own Miss Piggy.

33 00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:59,102 [classical music plays]

34 00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,935 (# Stayin' AliveI

35 00:02:07,966 --> 00:02:11,035 l use my walk
 * 1) Well, you can tell by the way

36 00:02:11,099 --> 00:02:13,602 No time to talk
 * 1) l'm a woman

37 00:02:13,666 --> 00:02:15,567
 * 1) Music loud and l am warm

38 00:02:15,633 --> 00:02:17,735 since l was born
 * 1) l've been kicked around

39 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:22,671 And you may look the other way
 * 1) And now it's all right, it's OK

40 00:02:22,733 --> 00:02:24,701
 * 1) We can ty to understand

41 00:02:24,766 --> 00:02:27,368
 * 1) rhe New York Times' enect on man

42 00:02:27,433 --> 00:02:29,735 or whether you're a mother
 * 1) Whether you're a brother

43 00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:31,635
 * 1) You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

44 00:02:31,699 --> 00:02:34,135 and eveybody shakin'
 * 1) Feel the city breakin'

45 00:02:34,199 --> 00:02:36,201
 * 1) And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

46 00:02:36,266 --> 00:02:41,004 Stayin' alive, stayin' alive
 * Ah, ha, ha, ha

47 00:02:41,066 --> 00:02:45,603
 * Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin' ali...

48 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:49,736 _ ...i...

49 00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:53,470 - _ ...ive - # Ohh

50 00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:59,369
 * 1) Life goin' nowhere

51 00:02:59,433 --> 00:03:02,169
 * 1) Somebody help me

52 00:03:02,233 --> 00:03:04,635
 * 1) Somebody help me, yeah

53 00:03:08,333 --> 00:03:11,202
 * 1) Life goin' nowhere

54 00:03:11,266 --> 00:03:14,202
 * 1) Somebody help me, yeah

55 00:03:14,266 --> 00:03:19,537
 * 1) Stayin' alive

56 00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:23,303 [all shouting]

57 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:39,969 or whether you're a mother
 * 1) Whether you're a brother

58 00:03:40,033 --> 00:03:41,968
 * 1) You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

59 00:03:42,033 --> 00:03:44,335 and eveybody shakin'
 * 1) Feel the city breakin'

60 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,468
 * 1) And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

61 00:03:46,533 --> 00:03:51,204 Stayin' alive, stayin' alive
 * Ah, ha, ha, ha

62 00:03:51,266 --> 00:03:53,501
 * Ah, ha, ha, ha

63 00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:57,703
 * 1) Stayin' alive #

64 00:04:05,233 --> 00:04:07,134 Well, l'll say this for them.

65 00:04:07,199 --> 00:04:09,669 - What's that? - They don't show favoritism.

66 00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:12,035 They offend eveyone.

67 00:04:14,566 --> 00:04:17,268 Aw, come on. Let us eat cake! Let us eat cake!

68 00:04:17,333 --> 00:04:21,303 Not only historically wrong, but hysterically wrong.

69 00:04:21,366 --> 00:04:24,168 - Sacré bleu! - What does that mean?

70 00:04:24,233 --> 00:04:26,034 Sacred blue.

71 00:04:27,733 --> 00:04:30,669 What a mess this place is. Beauregard, l've got a job for you.

72 00:04:30,733 --> 00:04:32,935 - Oh, good. - Just look at this mess.

73 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,869 OK. That sounds easy enough.

74 00:04:35,933 --> 00:04:40,003 Beauregard, the floor needs sweeping. There's a broom around here someplace.

75 00:04:40,066 --> 00:04:43,035 - Oh, yes, there it is. - Well, well, step on it.

76 00:04:43,100 --> 00:04:44,668 OK.

77 00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:47,101 [grunts]

78 00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:52,737 - Hey, that's a neat trick. - Beauregard, use some elbow grease!

79 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,868 Elbow grease?

80 00:04:54,933 --> 00:04:57,135 [creaking]

81 00:04:58,066 --> 00:04:59,967 Why didn't l think of that?

82 00:05:02,266 --> 00:05:06,703 And now, it's an honor to have one of the world's greatest recording stars,

83 00:05:06,766 --> 00:05:09,935 and here she is, swinging up a storm at an informal session

84 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:13,636 in the Muppets' private studio, Iadies and gentlemen, Helen Reddy!

85 00:05:14,233 --> 00:05:18,070 One, mo. One, mo, three...

86 00:05:18,133 --> 00:05:21,669 [soft melody playing]

87 00:05:24,300 --> 00:05:29,538
 * 1) When you can't find a friend

88 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:33,537
 * 1) And the road doesn't seem to end

89 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,535
 * 1) And you're lonesome

90 00:05:35,600 --> 00:05:40,171
 * 1) The whole day through

91 00:05:40,233 --> 00:05:43,903
 * 1) How can you be happy?

92 00:05:43,966 --> 00:05:47,636
 * 1) How can you be smiling?

93 00:05:47,699 --> 00:05:50,369
 * 1) How can you be anything

94 00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:54,603
 * 1) But low down saggy and blue?

95 00:05:57,666 --> 00:05:59,200 Hey, Roger, how's the balance?

96 00:05:59,266 --> 00:06:01,434 Animal's a little too loud on the drums.

97 00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:04,069 Oh, OK. Hey, Animal. Animal!

98 00:06:04,133 --> 00:06:07,736 [muffled shouting]

99 00:06:09,899 --> 00:06:13,570
 * 1) How can you be smiling?

100 00:06:13,633 --> 00:06:17,370
 * 1) How can you be singing?

101 00:06:17,433 --> 00:06:20,202
 * 1) How can you be anything

102 00:06:20,266 --> 00:06:24,069
 * 1) But low down saggy and blue?

103 00:06:26,833 --> 00:06:32,138 the sweet life eve_here
 * 1) l look around and see

104 00:06:33,199 --> 00:06:36,469
 * 1) l watch the cookie bushes shining

105 00:06:36,533 --> 00:06:39,369
 * 1) In the sun

106 00:06:40,466 --> 00:06:44,469
 * 1) The smell of sweet vanilla living

107 00:06:44,533 --> 00:06:47,669
 * 1) Blows in evey breath of air

108 00:06:48,699 --> 00:06:52,203
 * 1) Doesn't anybody want me?

109 00:06:52,266 --> 00:06:55,902
 * 1) Doesn't anybody care?

110 00:06:55,966 --> 00:06:59,803
 * 1) When you're wrinkled and cold

111 00:06:59,866 --> 00:07:03,536
 * 1) And your fortune has all been told

112 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:06,002
 * 1) And you're nobody's

113 00:07:06,066 --> 00:07:10,069
 * 1) l love you

114 00:07:10,133 --> 00:07:14,103
 * 1) How can you be happy?

115 00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:17,702
 * 1) How can you be singing?

116 00:07:17,766 --> 00:07:20,835
 * 1) How can you be anything

117 00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:24,003
 * 1) But low down saggy and blue?

118 00:07:24,066 --> 00:07:29,337 How can you be happy?
 * 1) Sad but true

119 00:07:29,399 --> 00:07:33,337
 * 1) How can you be singing?

120 00:07:33,399 --> 00:07:36,302
 * 1) How can you be anything

121 00:07:36,366 --> 00:07:40,403 and rag bag baggy
 * 1) But low down saggy

122 00:07:41,633 --> 00:07:47,372
 * 1) And blue? #

123 00:07:51,933 --> 00:07:53,934 - [applause] - [drums banging]

124 00:08:02,100 --> 00:08:06,270 You know, if l had a voice like Helen Reddy, l'd never be on rhe Muppet Show.

125 00:08:06,333 --> 00:08:08,802 Right. If you had a voice like Helen Reddy,

126 00:08:08,866 --> 00:08:10,867 you'd be in a side show!

127 00:08:16,433 --> 00:08:19,736 Ah, hey, vey good, Beauregard, it really looks great.

128 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,702 You've swept it spotless and polished it, too.

129 00:08:22,766 --> 00:08:26,136 Well, l couldn't find any elbow grease.

130 00:08:26,199 --> 00:08:29,703 - l expect not. - So l used axle grease.

131 00:08:30,399 --> 00:08:33,002 [shouting]

132 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,601 - Whoa! - [dish shatters]

133 00:08:36,799 --> 00:08:38,668 Brother!

134 00:08:40,133 --> 00:08:42,802 Beauregard, what kind of an idiot are you?

135 00:08:42,866 --> 00:08:45,802 Well, l didn't know there was a choice.

136 00:08:47,033 --> 00:08:49,635 - Floyd, watch out! - Huh? Whoa!

137 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,868 What a drag.

138 00:08:53,933 --> 00:08:56,068 [stammers]

139 00:08:56,133 --> 00:08:58,034 [shouts]

140 00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:03,102 Uh, Beauregard, how do you manage to stay upright?

141 00:09:03,166 --> 00:09:05,868 Well, l'm wearing these special shoes.

142 00:09:05,933 --> 00:09:08,935 - You want to borrow them? - l can't get anyplace without them.

143 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:11,168 - Good. - OK.

144 00:09:11,233 --> 00:09:14,102 l got to get my flippers into these slippers.

145 00:09:14,166 --> 00:09:16,501 These are non-slippers.

146 00:09:16,566 --> 00:09:20,369 Yeah. OK, what is the secret of these miracle shoes?

147 00:09:20,433 --> 00:09:23,736 Oh, there's no secret. l just nailed them to the floor.

148 00:09:23,799 --> 00:09:25,434 Whoa.

149 00:09:25,500 --> 00:09:27,501 Whoa.

150 00:09:28,633 --> 00:09:31,135 - [knocking] - [Animal and Swedish Cheq Helen!

151 00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:34,169 - Come in. Come in. - [both shouting] Helen!

152 00:09:34,233 --> 00:09:36,868 [Animal] Thank you!

153 00:09:37,733 --> 00:09:41,136 [chattering]

154 00:09:41,633 --> 00:09:43,368 [Chef hums]

155 00:09:44,033 --> 00:09:48,036 [both] # Happy Birthday to you

156 00:09:48,100 --> 00:09:51,803
 * 1) Happy Birthday to you

157 00:09:51,866 --> 00:09:54,935 - # Happy Birthday dear Helen... - Wait. Wait.

158 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:57,635 There's been some mistake. Today is not my birthday.

159 00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:00,167 Huh?

160 00:10:01,566 --> 00:10:05,403 Jingle all the way
 * 1) Jingle bells, jingle bells

161 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:09,770 And so my great Uncle Beauregard said to me, he said,

162 00:10:09,833 --> 00:10:14,337 ''Beauregard, you go into show business and you'll clean up.''

163 00:10:15,666 --> 00:10:18,035 You know something? He was right.

164 00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:20,335 You're named Beauregard after him?

165 00:10:20,399 --> 00:10:23,369 About 40 years after.

166 00:10:23,433 --> 00:10:26,135 - [Kermit] Beauregard! - Oh! l'm working! l'm working.

167 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:28,368 That's what l was afraid of. Stop polishing.

168 00:10:28,433 --> 00:10:31,302 - l've only done a little bit. - Get off! Off, off, off, off!

169 00:10:31,366 --> 00:10:33,367 [stammers] Now, ladies and gentlemen,

170 00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:37,103 we are going to have a brilliant dance number by Fozzie Bear and friends.

171 00:10:37,166 --> 00:10:39,201 But, uh, excuse me one second. Fozzie?

172 00:10:39,266 --> 00:10:40,500 Yeah, yeah. What?

173 00:10:40,566 --> 00:10:43,435 Be careful, there is a slippey place on the stage out here.

174 00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:46,469 - Where is that? - l don't know. Right around here...

175 00:10:47,033 --> 00:10:49,034 Thank you.

176 00:10:49,100 --> 00:10:50,935 [stammers] Curtain!

177 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:52,167 Whoa!

178 00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:55,436 - [music plays] - [applause]

179 00:10:59,333 --> 00:11:01,034 A-ha.

180 00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:06,501 - Whoa! - [crashing]

181 00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:11,469 Uh, be careful, there's a wet spot right here on the stage.

182 00:11:11,533 --> 00:11:13,201 [chuckles]

183 00:11:15,066 --> 00:11:17,468 Careful. It's right there, it's right there.

184 00:11:18,633 --> 00:11:22,470 Terrific, guys. You look great. Whoa!

185 00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:27,269 Uh, guys, be careful, there's a place right here.

186 00:11:28,666 --> 00:11:31,368 Watch out, there's a wet place! Watch out, right there!

187 00:11:34,733 --> 00:11:35,867 What the...?

188 00:11:35,933 --> 00:11:37,134 Whoa!

189 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,535 Go to the front, l'll go back here.

190 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:43,935 Hey! Whoa!

191 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:47,603 [shouting and crashing]

192 00:11:52,399 --> 00:11:54,702 [reporter] Here is a Muppet News Flash.

193 00:11:55,633 --> 00:11:57,868 Dateline Silver Spring, Mayland.

194 00:11:57,933 --> 00:12:01,836 At this vey moment, Mr. and Mrs. George Laser of Silver Spring,

195 00:12:01,899 --> 00:12:06,371 are attempting to break the record for over-hand refrigerator throwing.

196 00:12:06,433 --> 00:12:07,901 And...

197 00:12:11,566 --> 00:12:14,302 [classical music]

198 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:22,636 [hums along]

199 00:12:36,566 --> 00:12:39,001 [statue snoring]

200 00:12:53,333 --> 00:12:56,669 [plays loudly]

201 00:13:01,733 --> 00:13:06,604 - [plays softly] - [hums along]

202 00:13:06,666 --> 00:13:09,635 - Don't hum. - Yes, sir.

203 00:13:29,066 --> 00:13:33,003 [snoring]

204 00:14:02,966 --> 00:14:05,335 [applause]

205 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:14,203 You know, Helen, you did a song about, um, oh, l don't know,

206 00:14:14,266 --> 00:14:17,736 a few years ago, it's one of my vey favorite songs of all time.

207 00:14:17,799 --> 00:14:19,501 Really? Which one was it?

208 00:14:19,566 --> 00:14:22,635 Well, it was called You and Me Against the World.

209 00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:25,569 Oh, sure. That was a song l did with my daughter.

210 00:14:25,633 --> 00:14:26,734 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah.

211 00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:29,068 - You did it with your daughter? - Mm-hmm.

212 00:14:29,133 --> 00:14:32,736 Well, uh, do you suppose that, um, you could do it with a frog?

213 00:14:33,433 --> 00:14:36,269 - You mean just you and me? - Mm-hmm.

214 00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:37,934 l think so.

215 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:41,336 (# You and Me Against the Worl_

216 00:14:45,766 --> 00:14:50,070
 * 1) You and me against the world

217 00:14:50,966 --> 00:14:53,234
 * 1) Sometimes it feels like

218 00:14:53,299 --> 00:14:56,703
 * 1) You and me against the world

219 00:14:57,500 --> 00:14:59,201
 * 1) When all the others

220 00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:03,036
 * 1) Turn their backs and walk away

221 00:15:03,466 --> 00:15:08,437
 * 1) You can count on me to stay

222 00:15:10,933 --> 00:15:16,171 came to town
 * 1) Remember when the circus

223 00:15:18,366 --> 00:15:23,270
 * 1) And you were frightened by the clown

224 00:15:24,933 --> 00:15:28,336
 * 1) Wasn't it nice to be around

225 00:15:28,399 --> 00:15:31,603
 * 1) Someone that you knew

226 00:15:31,666 --> 00:15:34,935
 * 1) Someone who was big and strong

227 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:39,070
 * 1) And looking out for you

228 00:15:39,133 --> 00:15:43,904
 * 1) And me against the world

229 00:15:44,566 --> 00:15:47,302
 * 1) Sometimes it feels like

230 00:15:47,366 --> 00:15:50,736
 * 1) You and me against the world

231 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:57,104
 * 1) And for all the times we've cried

232 00:15:57,166 --> 00:16:02,471 that God was on our side
 * 1) l always felt

233 00:16:05,266 --> 00:16:09,503
 * 1) And when one of us is gone

234 00:16:10,633 --> 00:16:15,537
 * 1) And one of us is left to cary on

235 00:16:18,333 --> 00:16:22,537
 * 1) Then remembering will have to do

236 00:16:23,266 --> 00:16:28,137
 * 1) Our memories alone will get us through

237 00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:34,838
 * 1) Think about the days of me and you

238 00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:40,836
 * 1) You and me against

239 00:16:40,899 --> 00:16:44,136
 * 1) The world #

240 00:16:55,533 --> 00:16:57,701 - Hey, Beau? - Yes, sir?

241 00:16:57,766 --> 00:17:00,001 l see the floors are no longer slippey.

242 00:17:00,066 --> 00:17:04,503 Oh, well, that's probably because Kermit told me to spread a little sand around.

243 00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:06,467 A little sand?

244 00:17:06,533 --> 00:17:09,702 Somebody ought to teach you the meaning of a little, though.

245 00:17:10,299 --> 00:17:14,337 - l don't believe this! - [camel howls]

246 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,703 - You believe that? - [howling]

247 00:17:20,299 --> 00:17:23,336 [announcer] And now, Veterinarian's Hospital.

248 00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,902 The continuing stoy

249 00:17:25,966 --> 00:17:29,369 of a quack who's gone to the dogs.

250 00:17:29,433 --> 00:17:31,768 - Hubba hubba. - Oh! Mmm.

251 00:17:33,966 --> 00:17:35,834 So, where's the next patient?

252 00:17:35,900 --> 00:17:37,401 Oh, right here, Dr. Bob.

253 00:17:37,466 --> 00:17:41,703 Oh. Oh, look at that. He looks cold. We'd better turn up the heat.

254 00:17:41,766 --> 00:17:45,536 Dr. Bob, those are not earmuffs he's wearing.

255 00:17:45,599 --> 00:17:47,635 He was in the recording studio.

256 00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:49,435 Don't you know about headsets?

257 00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:52,803 Of course. The head sets on the neck, the neck sets on the shoulders.

258 00:17:52,866 --> 00:17:54,000 [nurses groan]

259 00:17:54,066 --> 00:17:56,701 l learned that the first year in doctor class.

260 00:17:56,766 --> 00:17:59,702 Dr. Bob, have you forgotten about the patient?

261 00:17:59,766 --> 00:18:03,970 No, the patient is the one who's sick. l learned that the second year.

262 00:18:04,766 --> 00:18:07,401 No, Dr. Bob, this patient.

263 00:18:07,466 --> 00:18:08,934 He's lost his hearing.

264 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,168 Well, maybe he dropped it some place.

265 00:18:11,233 --> 00:18:13,468 l'll look under the table.

266 00:18:13,533 --> 00:18:16,569 What kind was it? A clip on or one of those pierce jobs?

267 00:18:16,633 --> 00:18:20,603 Not his earring, his hearing, Dr. Bob.

268 00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:22,534 This man can't hear anything.

269 00:18:22,599 --> 00:18:25,436 [scoffs] He's lucky. l've heard evey dumb word.

270 00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:27,268 Well, let's get these off.

271 00:18:27,333 --> 00:18:29,001 [grunting]

272 00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:34,235 - There we go. - Can you hear me?

273 00:18:34,299 --> 00:18:36,168 Of course l can hear you.

274 00:18:36,233 --> 00:18:38,501 - Not you, him. - How can l hear him?

275 00:18:38,566 --> 00:18:40,567 He hasn't said a word.

276 00:18:40,633 --> 00:18:44,803 lf Florence Nightengale had to put up with this she'd have been a waitress.

277 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:48,535 Well, l can't do anything about his hearing now.

278 00:18:48,599 --> 00:18:51,102 - Call me tomorrow. - No, Dr. Bob.

279 00:18:51,166 --> 00:18:53,601 - You're responsible for his ears. - Hmm.

280 00:18:53,666 --> 00:18:56,602 You're right. Call me ear responsible.

281 00:18:56,666 --> 00:18:58,634 - # Call me... - [nurses groan]

282 00:18:58,700 --> 00:19:02,437 [announcer] And so we come to the end ofanotherVeterinarian's Hospital.

283 00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:05,936 Tune in next week when you'll hear Dr. Bob say:

284 00:19:07,133 --> 00:19:10,369 Ah, no wonder he can't hear anything.

285 00:19:10,433 --> 00:19:13,068 He has a little drum in there, it'll have to come out.

286 00:19:13,133 --> 00:19:16,369 No, no, no. That's his ear drum. That stays.

287 00:19:16,733 --> 00:19:20,103 What about the tiny little piano and bass?

288 00:19:20,166 --> 00:19:21,467 [nurses groan]

289 00:19:24,599 --> 00:19:29,204 (# Tie Me Kangar_ Down, Spom

290 00:19:29,266 --> 00:19:33,803 Tie me kangaroo down
 * 1) Tie me kangaroo down, sport

291 00:19:33,866 --> 00:19:37,703 Tie me kangaroo down
 * 1) Tie me kangar_ down, mate

292 00:19:37,766 --> 00:19:38,766
 * 1) All together now!

293 00:19:38,833 --> 00:19:43,270 Tie me kangaroo down
 * 1) Tie me kangaroo down, sport

294 00:19:43,333 --> 00:19:48,071 Tie me kangaroo down
 * 1) Tie me kangar_ down, mate

295 00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:52,537 Tie me kangaroo down
 * 1) Tie me kangar_ down

296 00:19:52,599 --> 00:19:56,203
 * 1) Tie me kangaroo down #

297 00:19:56,266 --> 00:19:58,868 [all shouting]

298 00:20:02,099 --> 00:20:04,869 Well, uh, no more sand.

299 00:20:04,933 --> 00:20:07,068 And the slipperiness is gone.

300 00:20:07,133 --> 00:20:09,602 Hey, nice goin', guys! Way to go.

301 00:20:09,666 --> 00:20:12,135 Well, that takes care of the sand.

302 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,435 Yep. And l'm glad to be rid of it.

303 00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:17,936 Yeah, l swept all the sand out of here.

304 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,268 - Now, where did you put it? - Next door.

305 00:20:20,333 --> 00:20:22,301 But that's the stage!

306 00:20:24,799 --> 00:20:27,502 - What are we gonna do? - What can we do?

307 00:20:27,566 --> 00:20:28,800 Uh, get some costumes.

308 00:20:28,866 --> 00:20:32,736 Scooter! Get a couple of tents. Fozzie, a palm tree.

309 00:20:32,799 --> 00:20:35,135 - [all talking] - Bring back that camel!

310 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:38,303 - Camel! - Lucky l happen to have a palm tree.

311 00:20:40,566 --> 00:20:42,968 Uh, and now once again, Iadies and gentlemen,

312 00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:45,969 our vey special guest star... Uh, are you ready back there?

313 00:20:46,033 --> 00:20:50,337 - [monster] No, we're not ready. - Oh... l'll tell you about Helen Reddy.

314 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,235 [monster] l said we weren't ready.

315 00:20:52,299 --> 00:20:55,870 - l wasn't talking to you. - [monster] OK, we're ready.

316 00:20:55,933 --> 00:20:59,703 [stammers] Uh, ladies and gentlemen, Helen Reddy. l hope this works.

317 00:21:01,799 --> 00:21:04,602 (# We'll Sing in the SunshineI

318 00:21:16,166 --> 00:21:19,502
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

319 00:21:20,333 --> 00:21:23,703
 * 1) We'll laugh evey day

320 00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:28,270
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

321 00:21:28,333 --> 00:21:31,669
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way

322 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:41,903
 * 1) l will never love you

323 00:21:41,966 --> 00:21:45,269
 * 1) The cost of love's too dear

324 00:21:45,966 --> 00:21:49,669
 * 1) But though l'll never love you

325 00:21:49,733 --> 00:21:52,602
 * 1) l'll stay with you for a year

326 00:21:52,666 --> 00:21:56,636
 * 1) And we can sing in the sunshine

327 00:21:56,700 --> 00:22:00,737
 * 1) We'll laugh eveyday

328 00:22:00,799 --> 00:22:04,703
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

329 00:22:04,766 --> 00:22:07,802
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way

330 00:22:14,700 --> 00:22:18,170
 * 1) l'll sing to you each morning

331 00:22:18,233 --> 00:22:22,370
 * 1) l'll kiss you evey night

332 00:22:22,433 --> 00:22:26,303
 * 1) But darlin' don't cling to me

333 00:22:26,366 --> 00:22:29,235
 * 1) l'll soon be out of sight

334 00:22:29,299 --> 00:22:33,437
 * 1) But we can sing in the sunshine

335 00:22:33,500 --> 00:22:37,537
 * 1) We'll laugh eveyday

336 00:22:37,599 --> 00:22:41,470
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

337 00:22:41,533 --> 00:22:44,802
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way

338 00:23:22,299 --> 00:23:26,270
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

339 00:23:26,333 --> 00:23:30,336
 * 1) We'll laugh evey day

340 00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:34,237
 * 1) We'll sing in the sunshine

341 00:23:34,299 --> 00:23:37,436
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way

342 00:23:38,333 --> 00:23:41,369
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way

343 00:23:42,599 --> 00:23:46,670
 * 1) Then l'll be on my way #

344 00:23:49,133 --> 00:23:51,368 [applause]

345 00:24:04,666 --> 00:24:06,768 Now we could go on like this for hours

346 00:24:06,833 --> 00:24:09,302 but we've grown to like you, so we'll stop.

347 00:24:09,366 --> 00:24:12,268 But not before we say thank you to our wonderFul guest star,

348 00:24:12,333 --> 00:24:14,735 Helen Reddy. Yay!

349 00:24:18,366 --> 00:24:22,336 Thank you, Kermit. l can't tell you how much l enjoyed working with a camel.

350 00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,001 Oh, you say you enioyed it?

351 00:24:24,066 --> 00:24:26,301 l said l can't tell you that.

352 00:24:29,833 --> 00:24:32,802 Hey, lady... you like him? He's yours.

353 00:24:36,166 --> 00:24:37,901 Good grief. What's his name?

354 00:24:37,966 --> 00:24:41,135 - Sopwith. - Sopwith, the camel?

355 00:24:41,799 --> 00:24:44,135 We'll see you next time on The Muppet Show.

356 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:24,267 Just as l thought.

357 00:25:24,333 --> 00:25:26,968 - What's that? - After this show, nothing hurts.