Episode 109: Charles Aznavour

The Muppet Show
Guest	Charles Aznavour
Production	June 29 - July 1, 1976
Releases	Season One
(TRANSCRIPT)

"The Old Fashioned Way"

When he's unable to get a spot on the show, Gonzo asks Scooter to be his manager. Scooter advises Gonzo to do a rock act, banging on a large rock with a mallet. Later, Gonzo tries his hand at female impersonation, wearing a dress and a blonde wig. Scooter gives up managing when Gonzo eats his contract.

Songs/Sketches

• "I Feel Pretty"
• "The Old Fashioned Way"
• Veterinarian's Hospital: Dead Patient
• At the Dance
• UK Spot: "Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor on the Bedpost Overnight?"
• Talk Spot: Charles speaks French to Miss Piggy.
• Panel Discussion: What is Man's Role in the Universe?
• Fozzie's Comedy Act: Statler and Waldorf bury Fozzie with his own punchline.
• "Inchworm"

Notes

• Fran Brill has her second straight (and last notable) appearance, performing the "I Feel Pretty" sketch previously done in Julie on Sesame Street.
• Charles Aznavour dubbed his own voice for the French dub, Le Muppet Show.

Episode

Picture	Description
	"The Muppet Show Theme": Gonzo hits the "O" and church bells chime.
	A beautiful Whatnot girl sings "I Feel Pretty" as she prepares to go on a date, removing her features piece by piece and replacing them with the face of a horrible monster. Her date turns out to be Beautiful Day Monster, who couldn't be happier about the change.
	Backstage, Gonzo approaches Kermit to find out why he hasn't been onstage to perform the last few weeks. Kermit explains why: "I have seen you eat a rubber tire to music, and I have seen you play a concert on your head with a mallet, and Gonzo, my dear friend, it doesn't work." Gonzo protests, insisting that he is an artist, and doesn't play for the masses. Kermit reccomends that Gonzo get a manager, someone to guide his career.
	Charles dances with Mildred in "The Old Fashioned Way" as pairs of Full-Bodied Humanoids dance in the background. (Edited from The Muppet Show: Season One DVD)
	Gonzo has found his manager, Scooter. Gonzo believes that Scooter understands the soul of a true artist. Scooter has come up with a plan to change Gonzo's whole repertoire, starting by having him do a rock act. Or, rather, an act where Gonzo repeatedly hits a rock with a mallet while shouting "ART!"
	Veterinarian's Hospital: Dr. Bob determines that his patient has died. But all is not lost. Dr. Bob's record is saving nine out of ten and this patient was number ten.
	Hilda has brought Charles a meal: roast chicken, salad, and French bread. Charles points out that the bread is not actually a French loaf, but the bread disagrees.
	At the Dance: Miss Piggy dances with a garbage man (who delivers), a banana shares a few terrible banana puns, and Animal's dance partner shows him what it's like to dance with him.
	UK Spot: The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband sings "Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor on the Bedpost Overnight?"
	Talk Spot: Kermit would like to know why French men are so lucky in love, and so Charles demonstrates the romantic power of his native language, winning over Miss Piggy by whispering to her in French, "Your oil filter has a leak and your transmission is sagging."
	Scooter has been scouring the wardrobe department for Gonzo to do a costume act. Scooter insists that female impersonation is a noble art. Though Kermit is against it, Scooter's uncle loves the idea. Thus Kermit allows Gonzo to go on after the dancers. Gonzo asks what he'll do when he goes onstage, to which Kermit replies, "Duck."
	Panel Discussion: What is man's role in the universe? Sam the Eagle believes it is to be decent and work hard. Mildred does not believe man can roll in the universe. He's not round enough to roll.
	Fozzie's Comedy Act: Statler and Waldorf bury Fozzie with his own punchline.
	Scooter has decided not to manage Gonzo. When Scooter presented him with the standard 50-page managerial contract, Gonzo ate it. Kermit just hopes that the contract's not binding.
	Charles sings "Inchworm" with a chorus of Muppet school children.
	Charles and the loaf of bread have become friends since meeting in the dressing room.

Edits

• On The Muppet Show: Season One DVD, Charles' opening number, "The Old Fashioned Way", is cut.

Cast

Muppets:

Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Gonzo, Rowlf the Dog, Scooter, Statler and Waldorf, Whatnot Woman-Monster, Mary Louise, Beautiful Day Monster, Janice, Animal, Red-Haired Woman, George the Janitor, Mildred Huxtetter, Hilda, The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband, Sam the Eagle, Rat, Pig, Banana, French Bread

Background Muppets:

Zoot, Blue Frackle, Zelda Rose, Paul

Performers

Jim Henson as Kermit the Frog, Waldorf, Rowlf, The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband Jug Blower, Students, and Ugly version of woman from opening number

Frank Oz as Fozzie Bear, Miss Piggy, George the Janitor, Mildred, Sam the Eagle, Animal, Animal's dancing partner, and The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband guitar player

Jerry Nelson as The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband banjo player and Beautiful Day Monster

Richard Hunt as Scooter, Mildred, Statler, loaf of bread, Mary Louise, Miss Piggy, and Miss Piggy's dancing partner

Eren Ozker as Hilda, Janice, Banana, and the Gogolala Jubilee Jugband girl

Dave Goelz as The Great Gonzo

Fran Brill as pretty version of woman from opening number

John Lovelady as Rat and the Announcer

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