Muppets Tonight
Air Date September 21, 1997
Written by Dick Blasucci, Paul Flaherty, Darin Henry, Jim Lewis, Kirk Thatcher and Patric Verrone
Director Gary Halvorson
Prod. no. 111


Heather Locklear MT.jpg


Muppets Tonight Episode 203 - Heather Locklear

The Muppets just try to survive the rest of the episode when Heather Locklear begins changing between "Good" and "Evil" Heather after eating Dr. Bunsen Honeydew's experimental mood-altering snack foods. And later her mood changes by hypnotism whenever she hears two taps. In the final number, every time Kermit tapped his cane twice, she changed her personality but didn't really hurt anyone at the times she was evil. Then Bunsen undoes the hypnotism by hitting her with a small mouth bass.

Skit Highlights

The opening musical number. A man in a coffee bar wonders why everyone drinks so much coffee. A waiter calls the restuarant's entertainer, who explains, Carmen Miranda style, that they have to get rid of all the excess coffee.

  • Hardy Pig Boys in "The Mystery of the Zombie Queen of the Amazon Outer Space Jungle Bee-Woman Case (based on a novel by Jane Austen)"

Andy and Randy have written a parody of Edward Stratemayer's Hardy Boys books, which even they don't understand; they claim it is based on a "Jane Austen Pizza". Heather Locklear plays the Bee-Woman of the title, but needs some persuading to go through with it. Infuriated by the pigs' stupidity, she starts looking through the script for something funny, and eventually finds a scene where the Hardy Pig Boys are sacrificed to the monster Frogzilla, played by Kermit.

Clifford thinks he has found a use for the evil Heather, by casting her as the evil Diamanda in "Muppet Heights". But Dr. Bunsen Honeydew has given her the antidote, and made her unbelievably nice. Sal and Bill The Bubble Guy, her co-stars, appreciate her niceness, but Johnny Fiama, who is supposed to be playing her love interest, is infuriated and storms off.

Dr. Phil Van Neuter tells the story of Percy, a cannibal pig.

Kermit attempts to sing an edited version of this vaudeville song with Heather for the closing number, but every time he taps his cane in time to the music, Heather's mood changes, causing chaos.


Picture Description

Heather Locklear enters the studio, but finds no one is around. All the Muppets are seen hiding in the closet, fearing that the bad things she does on Melrose Place will happen to them. She finds them and assures them she's nice in real life and wouldn't hurt a flea, except an annoying one that appears.
Title.tonight.jpg "Muppets Tonight Theme"
Clifford introduces Muppets Tonight, the show that has everyone saying...
"Get that thing outta here!" Waldorf yells to two movers, who take the TV away.
Clifford then takes us to a favorite hangout: the local coffee emporium.

Steve enters a busy café and asks the clerk why everyone is in such a coffee craze. He calls out Theresa, who leads the rest of the customers in a big production of "The Coffee Song". Steve takes a sip and gets hooked, drinking so much his head blows off.
Nigel complements the performers, when Steve's head falls onto the control panel, while his head-less body stumble around the control room.

Clifford tells the audience that Heather wished to something sophisticated, and they came up with this:

The Hardy Pig Boys in "The Mystery of the Zombie Queen of the Amazon Outer Space Jungle Bee-Woman Case", staring Andy and Randy Pig as the Hardy Pig Boys (and also wrote the sketch). Heather reluctantly plays the queen, Hawaya, leading to several puns on her name. Disgusted, she skips through the script, coming to the part where Frogzilla appears. Kermit is excited to play the bad guy for once, but collapses under the weight of a tree he pulls up.
Ice Station Zebra literally freezes his stripes off while regretting his choice of outpost.


Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker wheel down the hall their experimental "Mood Meals". The biscotti makes you nicer, while the chimichanga make you pure evil. While Bunsen heads to the bathroom, Heather takes a taste of the chimichange (despite Beaker's warnings). She then experiences a quick mood change and delivers a large punch to Beaker, sending him flying toward the stage. Heather then enters the control room, proclaiming she is in charge now (complete with lightning and thunder). Bunsen makes a documentation from outside on his tape recorder, not noticing the chaos inside. Nigel's control panel is carried outside as he scrambles to cue something.
UK Spot: Fairyland PD: "The Emperor's Lewd Clothes"
Bobo the Bear tries out some glasses as a disguise (like Clark Kent), which surprisingly work on everyone but Clifford. They catch the Emperor supposedly streaking, but he thinks he's wearing a beautiful outfit. The Chief lets him go, since he signs the checks. He tries on Bobo's glasses and is mistook for a crook who kidnapped the chief.
Clifford reports to Rizzo he is putting Heather in the "Muppet Heights" sketch because of her evil nature. However, Bunsen gives word that he gave Heather the "nice" antidote.
"21 Muppet Heights": Clark Bar (Johnny Fiama) can't keep the sketch together when Heather won't stay evil for her character, inviting Chaz (Sal Minella) and William B. Guy to a slumber party.
Clifford can't take watching the sketch either. Rizzo tells him he'll go to Busen again, sure they can't screw up twice in the same episode.
Tales from the Vet: Dr. Phil van Neuter yells at Mulch for letting the opening music drag on while he listens to the Goldberg Variation on 8-Track. He then tells the chilling story of "Percy, the Pork-Eating Pig". In the story, Percy enjoys a ham sandwich, then wonders where his Uncle Oscar went. Afterwards, Phil commands Mulch to play the closing score, but Mulch instead plays the theme to "The Patty Duke Show". He and Mulch dance to it anyway.
Bunsen plans to form a balance between the two personas using hypnosis, but she is called onstage for her final number before he can finish.
Kermit tries singing "Strolling Through the Park One Day", but Heather's personality keeps changing from good to evil whenever a bell sounds off (because of the hypnosis) and ends up knocking everyone down and whacking rabbits with her parasol.
The two men then bring Statler and Waldorf a TV from the Muppets Tonight Sweepstakes; they lost!
Bunsen closes the show by applying the treatment that returns her to normal: whacking her in the head with a fish.
Big Mean Carl begins eating the rest of the supply of Mood Meals, having a literal love-hate opinion of them (and a lamp and clock he eats).


  • This episode was shot as part of the first season (production number 111), but was not aired until the second.


Bill Barretta - Johnny Fiama, Bobo the Bear, Big Mean Carl
Kevin Clash - Clifford, Mulch, Bill (singing voice), Animal (performer)
Dave Goelz - Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Gonzo, Waldorf, Randy Pig, Bill the Bubble Guy, Flea, Bill (speaking line)
Brian Henson - Sal Minella, Nigel, Slim Wilson, Dr. Phil van Neuter, Seymour
Jerry Nelson - Statler, Ice Station Zebra, Percy the Ham-Eating Pig, Announcer
Frank Oz - Animal (voice)
Steve Whitmire - Kermit the Frog, Beaker, Rizzo the Rat, Andy Pig
Leslie Carrara-Rudolph
Julianne Buescher
Thom Fountain
Terri Hardin
Bruce Lanoil
Len Levitt
Drew Massey
Joe Selph
Allan Trautman
Mavis Vegas Davis



Clifford, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Beaker, Kermit the Frog, Johnny Fiama, Sal Minella, Gonzo, Bill the Bubble Guy, Nigel (Muppets Tonight), Andy and Randy Pig, Statler and Waldorf, Dr. Phil van Neuter, Mulch, Bobo the Bear, Zippety Zap, Seymour, Slim Wilson, Animal, Big Mean Carl, Bill, Flash, Chief, Randall the Zebra, Whatnots

Background Muppets:

Chip, Bean Bunny, Lenny the Lizard, Spotted Dick, Lew Zealand, Flower-Eating Monster, Blue Frackle, Zelda Rose, Quongo, Agnes Stonewick, J. P. Grosse, Banana, Parrots, Penguins, Murray the Minstrel, Rabbits


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