Rowlf
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Ladies and gentlemen, once again, the one and only Mr. George Burns.
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Applause. Rowlf plays an opening flourish.
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Rowlf
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Well, what do you say, George, would you do one more song for us?
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George
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You don't think I came over here just to do one song.
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Miss Piggy
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(amorous) Mr. Burns, oh, oh, I've been a fan of yours for years. Would you — would you sing a song just for moi?
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George
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I could never say no to a lady.
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Rowlf
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Well, you don't have to worry then. It's only Miss Piggy. (chuckles)
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Miss Piggy
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Cool it, flea bait. Now, ahem, where were we?
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George
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I was about to say yes to a lady.
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Miss Piggy
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Thank you, Mr. Burns.
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George
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Now look, let's get the group out because this song I'm gonna sing needs all the help I can get.
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Rowlf plays an opening flourish. They are joined by Gonzo, Nigel, Scooter, Baskerville, Blue Frackle and Miss Mousey.
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Rowlf
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Okay, come on out here, everybody. Here we go.
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George
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Now, Rowlf, in my key.
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Rowlf
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All right.
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George
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And kids, I want you all to follow me.
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Scooter
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Yes, sir.
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Nigel
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Yes, sir.
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George
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I could be happy, could be sad, could be good, could be bad —
It all depends on you.
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) All depends on you.
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George
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That's nice.
Could be humble, could be proud, could be lonesome in a crowd —
It all depends on you.
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) All depends on you.
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George
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I can save money and spend it, go right on living or end it —
You're to blame, honey, for what I do.
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) What I do.
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George
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Could be beggar, could be king, could be almost any old thing …
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) It all depends on you.
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George
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Bum, bum, bum, bum. Now hold that note. I'll find another song. You — oh — I got it.
You made me love you, I didn't want to do it.
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Muppets
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Didn't want to do it, didn't want to do it,
Didn't want to do it, (slowing) didn't want to do it …
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George
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You made me want you—
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Gonzo
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Didn't want to do it…
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George
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You made me want you and all the time you knew it.
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Muppets
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All the time you knew it, all the time you knew it,
All the time you knew it, (slowing) all the time you knew it…
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George
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You made me happy sometimes—
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Gonzo
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Didn't want to do it…
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George
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You made me happy sometimes, you made me sad,
And there were times, dear, you made me feel so glad…
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) So glad…
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George
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That's nice. Let's — let's — let's do that again. So glad.
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Muppets
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(harmonizing) So glad…
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George
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You made me sigh for—
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Gonzo
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Didn't want to do it…
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George
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You made me sigh for I didn't want to tell you,
I want your love, that's true,
Yes, I do, you know I do, indeed I do
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An orchestra backs them up for the big finish.
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George & Muppets
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Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme what I cry for.
You know you've got the kind of kisses that I'd die for.
You know you made me … love you.
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George
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(scats)
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Muppets
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You.
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George
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(scats)
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Muppets
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You.
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George & Muppets
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(scats)
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Gonzo
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Didn't want to do it…
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Gonzo looks up at the others, gulps, and hides.
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George
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But you did.
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Muppets
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Yes, we did.
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Applause.
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