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Backstage, Mac tunes his guitar. Link approaches him.
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Link Hogthrob
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Howdy, Mac.
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Mac
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Well, howdy, Link.
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Link Hogthrob
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You got a few minutes for a fellow star?
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Mac
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(laughs) Sure, Link. Yeah …
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The Beakers chase Bunsen past them.
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Link Hogthrob
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Watch it! Watch it! You're getting dust on my expensive, but tasteful, outfit.
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Mac
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You know, that is a mighty tasteful outfit. I like it.
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Link Hogthrob
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Oh, well, thank you. I just threw it on. Actually, I'm good at that.
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Mac
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(pats him) You're not bad at layin' it on, either.
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Link Hogthrob
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(nods) Why, thank you. Y'know, I just wanted to tell you, be sure and watch me in the police sketch that's coming up.
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Mac
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Okay. You're pretty good, huh?
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Link Hogthrob
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"Good" is not the word.
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Mac
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Yeah, I can believe that.
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Link Hogthrob
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"Terrific" is more the word.
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Mac
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Well, y'know something, Link? I've always thought that you had a certain, uh …
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Link Hogthrob
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A certain je ne sais quoi. Yeah, I know exactly what it is. Animal magnetism.
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Mac
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Yeah. You can say that again. (strums) Uh, y'know, I've got a song that's just absolutely perfect for you. I'm gonna sing it for you. Sing along if you'd like.
Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble,
When you're perfect in every way.
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Link Hogthrob
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You too, huh?
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Mac
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I can't wait to look in the mirror …
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Link Hogthrob
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Yeah.
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Mac
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'Cause I get better looking each day.
To know me is to love me.
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Link Hogthrob
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Mm.
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Mac
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Well, I must be a hell of a man.
Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble,
But I'm doing the best that I can.
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Link Hogthrob
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I know exactly what you mean.
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Mac
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I bet you do.
I used to have a girlfriend,
But I guess she just couldn't compete,
With all of these love-starved women,
Who keep clamoring at my feet.
Well, I probably could find me another,
But I guess they're all in awe of me
Who cares? I never get lonesome,
'Cause I treasure my own company.
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Both
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Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble,
When you're perfect in every way.
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Link Hogthrob
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I can't wait to look in the mirror,
'Cause I get better looking each day.
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Mac
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To know him is to love him.
Well, he must be a hell of a pig.
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Link Hogthrob
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Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble,
When you're blessed with a talent this big.
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Mac
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Oh… come on, everybody, join in.
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The other Muppets gather around and join him.
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Mac & gang
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Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble — ("When you're perfect" —)
When you're perfect in every way. ("I can't wait to look in the mirror" —)
I can't wait to look in the mirror,
'Cause I get better looking each day. (To know me is to what?)
To know me is to love me. ("I must be a hell of a man" —)
I must be a hell of a man. ("Oh, lord, it's hard" —)
Oh, lord, it's hard to be humble … (What are we doin'?)
We're doing the best that we can. (One more time, I didn't hear you —)
We're doing the best that we can.
(All right!)
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Applause. Mac and the Muppets chatter as the Beakers look on.
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