Written by Pat Relf
Illustrator Tom Leigh
Published 1981
Publisher Random House
Series Muppet Press Storybooks
ISBN 039484713X

Muppet Manners is a 1981 Muppet Press storybook that brings a Muppet twist to the subject of good manners. In the book, Gonzo explains his tips for how to act in polite society, as he takes his friends out to dinner and a show. Naturally, the evening ends in mayhem.

A few of the notable tips:

  • Invitations should always be tasteful. Gonzo seems to prefer sardines, flattened and hand addressed.
  • If ink is spilled on a guest's coat, a combination of salt, flour, concentrated orange juice, and a little more ink will remove (or at least obscure) the stain.
  • When at a restaurant, if the Bill is too large, ask the waiter to take him back and bring a Stan or Mike.
  • When taking your seat at a performance, always grasp the chair firmly with both hands.


Book and audio editions

The book and audio version is introduced by Scooter, with other characters narrating alternate lines and tips (and with some editorial sound effects or asides not in the text). The voices are Dave Goelz as Gonzo; Jim Henson as Kermit and Swedish Chef; Frank Oz as Miss Piggy and Fozzie; Richard Hunt as Scooter, Sweetums and the cow; and Steve Whitmire as Rizzo the Rat (not pictured in the book).


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