|Music by||Phillip Namanworth|
|Lyrics by||Barbara Bottner|
|Publisher||Shirdi Music Company|
"The No Song" is sung when Oscar the Grouch asks Farley to help him get ready for his nephew's visit. Timothy Grouch is used to getting his own way, and his uncle doesn't want him to be spoiled. So Farley sings about a number of things that Timothy might ask his uncle, all of which Oscar replies to as "no."
- Fair Is Fair (1978)