|PERFORMER||Richard Hunt Father and Mother|
|Michael Earl Daughter|
This family consists of Mr. Quiet, his wife (referred to as Mother Quiet), and their daughter, who likes to sing "my dog has fleas" to her dog. Each member of the Quiet Family speaks very softly, but once both families are reunited, they begin to raise their voices and start a loud argument. The Loud Family soon follows suit and reverses their volume as well.
Mr. Quiet is a Pumpkin Anything Muppet, Mother Quiet a Lavender one, and the daughter a Hot Pink. Although Richard Hunt performs Mother Quiet for most of the sketch, she is performed by Kathryn Mullen during the family's argument toward the end.