Veterinarian's Hospital

Nurse Piggy, Dr. Bob, and Nurse Janice operate on Fozzie Bear

Dr. Bob, Nurse Piggy, and Nurse Janice as portrayed by Rowlf the Dog, Miss Piggy, and Janice appear in this recurring sketch where they tell bad jokes and fail at curing their patients of their ailments.

In Season One, The Announcer was played by John Lovelady, and opened each sketch with, "And now, the continuing story of a former orthopedic surgeon who's gone to the dogs." In subsequent seasons he is played by Jerry Nelson and opens the sketch with, "And now, the continuing stoooory of a quack who's gone to the dogs," and ends each sketch with "Tune in next week when you'll hear Nurse Piggy say..." (or he'd substitute the name of another character in the scene).

Individual Sketches

• Fozzie Bear

Janice is late because she was operating in another room. ("It's the talk of the hospital", says Dr. Bob) Fozzie is the patient, and when Dr. Bob considers not operating, Janice tells him that he's the only one who can save him. Dr. Bob claims to have saved 100 last year (dollars, not patients), but he also lost 200 pounds (not in weights, but in England). Seen in Episode 105: Rita Moreno.

• Dead Patient

The patient, a piece of blue fur, is dead. Seen in Episode 109: Charles Aznavour.

• Hiccupping Patient

A patient has the hiccups, but Dr. Bob is more concerned with his own problems, such as being overworked and underpaid. The patient eventually explodes, and decides to quit while he's ahead. Seen in Episode 110: Harvey Korman.

• Duck, not Chicken

The patient is a duck, but Dr. Bob keeps confusing it with a chicken. Seen in Episode 113: Bruce Forsyth.

• Frog in The Throat

Behemoth is at the hospital for a tummy ache and a sore throat. Dr. Bob hits his tummy with a hammer, giving him a tummy ache, but the patient explains that he has a sore throat and wants it to go away. Turns out he has a frog in the throat... Kermit. Seen in Episode 115: Candice Bergen.

• Chicken

Dr. Bob operates on a chicken. (Look closely and you'll see that the chicken only has one eyelid). Seen in Episode 116: Avery Schreiber.

• George the Janitor

George is the patient, but he doesn't feel any better at this hospital. Dr. Bob is told that he has given the hospital a bad name, and he agrees... Fred is a terrible name for a hospital. Seen in Episode 117: Ben Vereen and heard in The Muppet Show (LP).

• Bread

The patient is a talking loaf of bread. What does Dr. Bob make of it? Toast! Seen in Episode 118: Phyllis Diller.

• Three-Legged Creature

The three-legged creature from The Windmills of Your Mind is the patient. He has three left feet, but also has some feet in Cincinnati. Seen in Episode 201: Don Knotts.

• Fozzie returns

Fozzie is back in the hospital. Seen in Episode 204: Rich Little.

• Vets Hospital/ At the Dance

Fozzie accidently schedules two sketches at once, Veterinarians Hospital and At the Dance. Seen in Episode 204: Nancy Walker.

• Cow

The patient is a cow. Seen in Episode 211: Dom DeLuise, as well as It's The Muppets: More Muppets, Please!.

• Dr. Bob does a sketch twice

Dr. Bob asks who the Announcer is, and the Announcer answers, "I'm the guy who says, 'Welcome to Veterinarian's Hospital, the continuing stoooory of a quack who's gone to the dogs...", and the sketch is repeated. Seen in Episode 215: Lou Rawls.

• Vegetarian Hospital

Dr. Bob and Nurse Janice have been replaced by pigs. The UK Spot from Episode 224: Cloris Leachman.

• Hawian Patient

One of the pigs from the Hawian War Chant number is the patient. Seen in the Sylvester Stallone episode.

• Kermit

Kermit is the patient. Dr. Bob and Nurse janice crack jokes about both kermit's condition and Nurse Piggy's love for kermit. Seen in the Kenny Rogers epsiode. Also included in It's The Muppets: Meet the Muppets.

• The End of The World

Beauregard is worried sick because he thinks that the world is coming to an end. The sketch ends with the announcer falling on Beauregard. Seen in Episode 501: Gene Kelley.

• Nurse Lorretta

Lorretta Switt replaces Nurse Piggy. Seen in Episode 502: Lorretta Switt. Also included in the Playhouse Video: The Kermit and Miss Piggy Story.

• Pinnocchio

Pinnocchio is at the hospital because his nose grows every time he tells a lie. Seen in Episode 510: Senor Wenches.

• Gonzo

Gonzo is only in the hospital for laughs. The UK Spot in Episode 511: Paul Simon.